Minimum Security . . .

11.30.2005

The Place is hopping.
The new RubberSuit Studios/Hill TV forum is starting to hop. Some lively debates, Fun Games, cool members, a consistent posters. Those of you who have only been on once or twice, come back and join the fun.

Some updates.
The new Wraith is about 35% finished. There is some new schwag on the schwag page. Murk says the new podcast should be up by the weekend. A new item in the shop for a good cause. And I am not sure what is going on, but this site has averaged 14,000 hits for that past two days. Unique visitors and totally visitors have taken 20% jumps, our Alexa rank should drop again soon. Just gotta say thanks. Oh and don't forget. Tommorrow, Dropping My Daily Stool Sample begins with Xmas music!

Speaking of Alexa.
Check out their latest blog entry on the main page (down about halway). They are now ranking blogs . . . Interesting. It also has some tidbits about Alexa rankings and what they mean. Check yourself before you wridididiwreck yourself.

Gonna be an interesting Debate at to ole Supreme Court.
This is very interesting and a direct result of the maneuverings of the Bush Administration.

And you came about this decision how?
OK terrorists, scissors are now OK. Must be pressure from the NSA (National Seamstress Association).

WAIT WAIT!
What about his prize for being the 1000th customer?

OK, Buckos, here's our chance!
Fight for Free Internet!

And who is the most creative person you know?
If you said Malach, you would be right.

Ok.
Any kid who becomes a cannibal because of a video game, is mentally ill. Hey, I am not violent, and I watched Tom and Jerry all the time and I am OK, right?

Desperation.
Who's more desperate than the Angry Piper with out a Guinness? Evidently the US Army. Hey don't worry, Dubya gave us a new strategic plan today.

Back on Alanis Morrisette's case again.
Hey. NOW THIS IS IRONY!

Can't a 70 year old prostitute get a break around here?
I guess there is no forced retirement for women of ill repute.

No way!
Jacko has never lied about nothing.

Why Gary Glitter, Why?
Has Roman Polanski offered to be your room mate yet (ohh another webcomic idea).

It's just so cute!
I just want to hug it and squeeze it and call it George.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
And the people would eat up all the food, gobble, gobble, yum, yum, and it would become excrement and memories. What then for little Ecqador? - Kurt Vonnegut, Galapagos

I am Malach, a Master of the Universe.

Now some sexy stuff

11.29.2005

You are listening too . . .

Buena, by Morphine, off the album Cure for Pain. Morphine, based out of Boston, was best remembered for their innovative sound, which was created by Mark Sandman's vocals and 2 string slide bass, Dana Colleys baritone sax, and tribal percussion (they had two drummers over the course of their existence). Their incredible deep,big, sexy sound, was rivaled by Sandman's almost stream of concious lyrics, and sleepy vocals. They had some seminal success, and were soon signed to a major label. In 1999, Sandman collapsed on stage in Italy, and died of a heart attack. He was 46. Absolutely amazing band, and I regret not seeing them live, which I heard was mind blowing. This painting I did shortly after his death.
The song printed in the right side of the painting, in the black box is entitled I'm Free Now. The lyrics are appopriate to Sandman's life and death.

I'm free now to direct a movie

sing a song, or write a book about yours truly

how I'm so interesting, I'm so great

I'm really just a fuckup and it's such a waste

to burn down these walls around me

flexing like a heartbeat

we don't like to speak

don't talk to me for about a week

I'm sorry, it just hurts to explain

there's something going on that makes my guts ache

I got guilt, I got fear, I got regret

I'm just a panic-stricken waste I'm such a jerk

I was honest, I swear

the last thing I want to do

honest, I swear

the last thing I want to do

is ever cause you pain

Prison Break.

Does anyone actually watch this rediculous show. Correct me if I am wrong, but this guy gets, sets himself up to get arrested, and goes to prison, so he can break out his brother who is wrongly accused? And to top it all off, the guys who comes up with this plot, is not only the designer of the prison, but has the prison plans secretly tattooed on his body? Um, how about hiring a lawyer? Stupid show since Cop Rock.

Those crazy Canucks!

It's a Coup-de-tat EH?

Not that this is surprising.

Yes, the US environmental policy sucks, but what's up with the chick in the Polar Bear outfit?

So, do all these foreign dictators . .

go to the same school on how to be nutty? Is there some type of class on how to be a delusional despot?

Hey Idiots . .

So you really think it would be cheaper if the Cable Companies only charge you per channel . . . Dummies.

More idiots . .

So, CS Lewis died in the 60's, do you really think if he saw the magic they could make with movies now a days, he'd have the same opinion?

Instead of the no homos policy . .

How about a no pedophlies policy? I know a lot of homosexuals, and none of them are pedophiles.

Oh, man, what does TO think?

Really guy . .WTF? I mean if the Eagles could actually win something, perhaps.

Those nutty Japanese.

A word of advice from Malach. If some nut reports this on the internet, yet no reputable news agency is . . . You cannot believe everything you read on the internet. Did you learn your lesson? Oh and Hentai is sick, and Anime/Manga is WAY OVERATED!

Jet Li,

Don't know what love is? Poor Baby.

Welcome to A.com.

Or perhaps FU.com

SHHH!

Wait until they find my internet drug ring.

Malach's Quote of the Day.

He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals. - Ben Franklin

I am Malach, and I am a Piperholic.

Congratulations Toyi.

11.28.2005

Now you can take for granted the freedoms of the US more fully.
Congrats to psuedo-bucko Toyi (aka TOYI1SOCCER) she found out today she has been accepted to become a US citizen after a long wait. I believe next week she will be sworn in. Without revealing too much, Toyi was born in El Salvador, and emigrated to the US when was older. She has seen many things none of us can even imagine, and this country is better off with her as a citizen. Even though her and I have many a philisophical differences, I still value her opinion and friendship. Congratulations. In a way the song up on this blog right now is kind of an appropriate welcome to citizenship.

Cheese and Rice Palmer!
Since Palmer is a teen, he cannot seem to stick with a webcomic for more than a month. So he now has his own space in Stool Sample Webcomics. So RubberSuit Studios, and Stool Sample Webcomics officially announces the opening of Palmer's World! Banners are being made as we speak. In Addition, Palmer has decided to take a small breakfrom Ned, and make a Marvel Comics Parody. Stay tuned. By the way, if you are in the LA area of California, under 16, and looking for a young confused man . . . Palmer is available and rich!.

Another Guest Artist Gallery.
There is a new guest artist displaying work at RubberSuit Studios. Andrew Randall. Andy is a young man with Autism, Bi-Polar Disorder, and Tourette's Syndrome. He has little to no art training. Once my studio is back in order (being used right now for the remainder of moving storage, I might take him on as a student.

Minimum Security.
So far going really well, better than the old forum, new fun members. Check it out.

Hey Fella's . . .
Look who's available again! Dude, seriously, I would shoot myself after a couple days with this ditzy broad.

The new Xbox.
It is nice to see, nothing ever changes around microsoft.

So thats why Micheal Irvin is a dumbass.

Really, I kind of like global warming.
I mean, FLA weather up here, bring it on.

Fact:
No NFL Coach has ever had another head coaching job after being fired from the Lions.

I know why she is crying.
Tears of happiness, as there is a new JesusMan!.

ALITO!!!!
I can prove that the building is rejecting him like a donor organ.

Ahh, Mysteries.
Yeah, this seems a bit suspicious.

HEY!
I did not know the Pope had that much influence on Arab nations!

Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
Another good class. Sabbath, the very underrated Miles Davis, Skynyrd, the Pistols, and Blondie.

No, Daniel San . . .
Like I taught Potsy, Karate here, not there. Rest in peace Mr. Miyagi, the Sensei for a whole generation of young Suburbanites. The Angry Piper must be at his shrine now, praying for your souls safe arrival, and trying to catch insects with copsticks. By the way, I'll have a Chocolate Malted, and a Burger and fries.

COOOL!
Imagine the stunts they can pull off on JackAss! with this.

WTF!?!?!
30 Compressions, 15 is tiring enough. That's it no CPR for you.

RATZY!
Stop this nonsense.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
"I have opinions of my own - strong opinions - but I don't always agree with them." - Dubya. Can always count on the W for some nice quotes.

I am Malach, and I ALWAYS agree with my opinion.

Let's get Funkay!

11.27.2005

You are listening to . .
Ain't That a Bitch, by Johnny Guitar Watson, off the album of the same name(1976). It is an mp3 so it will take a little longer to load. Watson is the one of the most under appreciated artists/guitarists of all time, a God of the genre to many a musician in the know. A vituroso of many styles and influences, you are currently listening to his funk/blues exploration from the 1970's. His discography ranges from 1958 to 1994, fun, social concious, and technically excellent. He is the best muscian most of you have never heard of. Malach aims to change that. He is highly influential on musicians as diverse as Miles Davis, Kurt Cobain, Frank Zappa, Parliament, and Outkasts. Amazing career, and music. To top it all off, he died in stage in Yokohama Japan, in front of 100,000 people in the middle of the song Superman Lover. That's how I want to die. RIP my fly brother. Pick something up of his, and be amazed that this secret has been kept so long.

JesusMan!
Episode number 4.2 is loaded. Thanks for waiting and enjoy. You might notice some style changes, I am messing around with the art on this series.

Alexa Rank.
Bumped up to 56,559, still making nice jumps.

The 3rd thing at Christmas that such a pain to me . .
Stringing up the lights. No really, I actually enjoy doing the lights. Here some pics, edited to protect innocent vehicles. I think this is also the first that the Piper has seen of the new digs.

Speaking of Xmas.
There is some Xmas stuff in the RubberSuit Studios Fleamarket.

Do yourself a Favor.
Read The Stone over at Hill TV. AWESOME stuff. I think I am going to do some illustrations for it.

Malach's quote of the day.
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada." - Britney Spears

I am Malach, and I am an overseas place.

Malach is a giving god.

11.26.2005

At the Request of a Buckarino.
Malach has loaded a crunchier Sleater-Kinney song. This is song is Youth Decay, also off of All Hands on the Bad One. Happy?

JesusMan! . . .
is super close to being done, and I will give you once again a quick sneak of a panel form it. This panel is a bit special and it guest star none other than Injustice Clown. So here goes. No plot clues about what the hell is going on though, just because. Sexy, no?

Oh Xmas tree . .
The Xmas decorations are almost completely up. I will photo the suckers and post the image tomorrow.

Don't forget.
Dec 1, all Xmas music all the time on Dropping My Daily Stool Sample.

If you cannot tell, I LOVE XMAS!

Malach's quote of the day.
Now don't any of you worry your heads about Santa, Mrs. Claus will have him plenty fattened up before Christmas eve. It's always the same story. - Sam the Snowman, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer

I am Malach, and I am in the gift giving mood.

A pic of the Angry Piper

11.25.2005

Revenge.
Since the Piper revealed that I looked like Heat Miser in last night blog, I will show you what he looks like.



































Ta Da. I must say, Piper definitely has that nose.

Podcast.
Just finished recording the next Murk And Malach Show at the palatial estate of Dr. Murk. And coincidence upon coincidence, the Angry Piper was our cohost. This shiite came out funny, should be posted next weekend.

You are listening too. . .
Leave you Behind, off the album, All Hands on the Bad One, by Sleater-Kinney. S-K, is a huge favorite and a must have for those of you into garage rock style, deep lyric bands. They are the next generation of Sonic Youth, the Replacements, Patti Smith, and have a little of that Rrriot Grrrl sensibilty. If you are a chick, and don't have anything by them, do yourself a favor and listen to some real female rock music. If you love good music, by any of their albums and you won't be dissappointed.

JesusMan!
I have 8 of the 10 panels done, I just haven't had much time to finish it. Hopefully done by Sunday, is not Monday.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
Oh Shit it is 11:58PM - Malach.

I am Malach and I am always on time!

Happy Thanksgiving

11.24.2005

I hate Turkey.
Happy Turkey Day to all the buckos out there, and anyone else who happens upon this blog. I was gonna get all melodramatic and sappy, but personally, I am not a fan of the holiday. Addtionally, Turkey is one of the worst meat ever created, except for ham.

Now Xmas on the other hand . .
I love. As of Dec 1, You are now listening to will change to 1 Xmas tune per day.

Ban the Detriot Lions from the Thanksgiving Game.
Does anyone outside of Michigan care to see the Lions get their asses handed to them every Thanksgiving. Protest I say!

Malach's Quote of the Day.
You touched my hand, Chuck, you sly dog. - Peppermint Patty, A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving

I am Malach, and I could be the Heat Miser

SNEEZE AND PEE

11.23.2005

Updating you with the workings of Stool Sample Webcomics.
I am about 50% done with JesusMan! the next. It should be done by the end of the week end at the latest. This page has a nice little twist, in fact the full episode is quite twistastic.

I have begun blocking out the next page of The Wraith and that should be done by next weekend. As for Fat Bug? Still waiting for the art.

Our new Forum is going wonderfully. TOYI YOU NEED TO RE REGISTER! While still small, tis a fun crowd, with even Just Me chiming in. Addtionally, the forum itself had like 400 visits, and our site hits jumped up to 11,000 hits last night.

Murk and I will be recording our next podcast the day after Turkey Day. And check out the ad for it at Hill TV. Our special guest interview, we booked yesterday . . . that nut bag Tom Cruise. Oh yeah Tommy Baby, work the Scientology Sex Voodoo on me babay!

You are listening to . . .
The Flutes of Chi, off the album White Pepper, by Ween. Ween is so freakin' good. The are the Beatles of the last 10 years. You might be familiar with the seminal hit Push the Daisies. You need to check out there stuff. AMAZING. They are hard to catagorize, it be definitely art rock. Do yourself a favor, and at least pick up White Pepper on of the top 50 Albums of all time.

Them CRAZEE Norwegians . . .
Don't you like the Tom Cruise armpit hair?

In Soviet Russia . .
A Mother Russia, come back to us, you are much more fun the Al Queida.

Wait until the try to buy me out.
I'll say, leave the bucket of gold under the street lamp.

BIG MAN!
There is actual professional video gaming?

Mt. Saint Helens.
You dissappointed me yet again!

T - O, TO, TO, TO, T-O, T-O!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

CNN Apologizes for it "Mistake".
C'mon guys, you ain't fooling no one.

Those nutty Muslims.
Hey, she did not tell you about the drunken, pork eating, sex party, I filmed last week. Gonna put it up soon.

AHH, the State of Massachusetts . .
Giving the big ole middle figure to the conservative right like we always do. Hey DUBYA ADMIN, here's mine. YANKEES SUCK!











Malach's Quote of Day!
You know, Arthur, it's really been quite a day. On the outside, oh, sure, we were pursued by Swiss Industrial Spies, trapped in the belly of a whale. But what really pursued us? Where were we really trapped? C'mon, Arthur. Get meta with me. What pursued us were our own obsessions. I'm good, you're evil. I'm a superhero, you're a sidekick. I'm a woman, you're a man. What does it all mean? Nothing. And where were we all trapped? I'll tell you where, Arthur. In the belly of Love - Love, Chum, Love. - The Tick

I am Malach and I am trapped in the belly of love.

CHCHCHANGES!

11.22.2005

The New Minimum Security.
RubberSuit Studios and Hill-TV would like to annouce their new forums. Still named Minimum Security they are now located here. The reasons for this change? Well the reasons are several, most of the federal (that was for the Angry Piper). There are a number or reasons. First and foremost the pphbb boards are much more user friendly and have much more feature that the Invision ones. It is now loaded on my site, so I have much more control over what goes on, changes, advertising and such. Thirdly, I can now access the forum at work. All you favorites will still be there.

So expect that community to thrive once again. Join up for some fun. When joining make sure you read the rules. And change you bookmarks and links to http://rubbersuitstudios.com/smf/index.php?.

Now to answer Just Me's question.
I answered it in the forum, blogger did not allow that much html in comments. Screw Blogger anyway, they are the next to go.

HOLY SHNIKES!
The Angry Veteran not only posted one blog, but two? I am dumbstruck! Now if I can just pressure Palmer in to blogging again, the world will be right.

This time Ratzy, you don't got a leg to stand on.
This is not surprising, this has been going on quite a bit in the local Catholic Schools, firing teachers who don't meet the "Catholic Ideal". Well this time, methinks you have bit off a bit more that you can chew. BREAKING NEWS: The Pope has just commented on this on his blog!

Man, that is one ugly pooch.
Say hi to Eddie Guererro for me. I mean look at the thing . . . Is it even a dog? Look at the freakin' thing. I mean MY GOD. Imagine if this was a person.

Yeah, ok.
Too many jokes for this one.

YOU KIDS AND YOUR CRAZY TOYS!
That why I only let my kids play with lighters and broken glass.

So I got this email from the FBI.
C'mon people wake the hell up.

Global Warming.
Y'know, beside the fact I would be underwater, I wouldn't mind it warming up around here.

Snow for Turkey Day.
Yeah probably more like slush.

C'mon, People!
I am willing to trade things and "favors" to rename your town Rubbersuitstudios.com

This stuff rules.
After clicking the link, check out the slide show.

Ratzy . . . more comments?
A bet you'd like a contingent of young boys as gaurds.

Those Crazy Krauts.
I have not the words to expression my love for this man. You sir are my new hero.

How about . .
You call them Fuzzy Hoppy Nuggets.

Hmm . .
Float the city, now why did I not think of that?

The Mood of Red Sox Nation?
Excited, big trade, nervous Manny will be bye bye.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
You're a beautiful woman, probably. - Dr. Who

I am Malach, and I hate brussle sprouts.

Happy Anniversary Superstar!

11.21.2005

Happy Anniversary.
Though the good times and bad you have always been there. You support me through and through, unquestioningly. You have provided me with the two most beautiful gifts, our children, anyone has ever given to me. I would love to not have to be as busy as we are and just spend enternity in your arms.

I love you.

You are Listening to . . .
Fade Into You, off the Album So Tonight That I May See, by Mazzy Star. This was my wedding song, and it fits just as well as it did then. Mazzy Star is amazing, check them out. Hope Sandoval has the most amazing vocals . . . celestial, yet extremely sexy. Their music is this wonderful mix of eclectic rock.

Only one news story today.
Donate to your local food banks. I know it is tough, but every bit helps. Organize a food drive, donate some canned goods. I work for a non-profit that has a very large food pantry, our shelves are almost bare.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
For love is as strong as death.
I hear my Beloved. See how he comes
leaping on the mountains,
bounding over the hills.
My Beloved is like a gazelle,
like a young stag.
See where he stands behind our wall.
He looks in at the window,
he peers through the lattice.
My Beloved lifts up his voice, he says to me,
"Come then, my love,my lovely, come."
My dove, hiding in the clefts of the rock,
in the coverts of the cliff,
show me your face,
let me hear your voice;
for your voice is sweet
and your face is beautiful.
"My Beloved is mine and I am his.
He said to me:'Set me like a seal on your heart,
For love is strong as Death,
jealousy relentless as Sheol.
The flash of it is a flash of fir,
a flame of the Lord himself.'
Love no flood can quench,
no torrents down.
- SONG OF SONGS 2:8-10, 14, 16; 8:6-7

I am Malach, and I am he.

Alexa rankings.

11.20.2005

Moving on down buckos.
Well our Alexa Ranking is now down to 67,147 another jump down of about 7K. This puts us closer to a number of very popular webcomics, and should hopefully get us more traffic.

RubberSuit Radio.
You may notice a new feature to this blog . . . "you are listening to:". By this I hope to highlight some lesser known music for the buckos, provide you a way to purchase it, and maybe make this site a little more cash. I am planning on changing the song here every 2 - 3 days. I am also looking into, with Hill-TV, the possiblity of doing live internet radio.

So you are listening to . . .
Magnet's Coil, by Sebadoh, off the album Bakesale. Sebadoh is a seminally popular band from Western MA. It is one of Lou Barlow's many projects (including Folk Implosion, and early and later Dinosaur Jr.). Sebadoh is a nasty mix of crunchy guitar licks, sublime and surreal lyrics, and "alternative" rock. They have been around since the early 90's. Check 'em out.

More Schwag!
I have loaded up some more stuff on our schwag page. If you want to support us, use them to link, for avatars, for IM icons, etc. It is there for the buckos, so use it like birth control.

Happy Anniversary Elektra.
I love you more than anything in the entire world. Best 10 years of my life. It is actually tomorrow, but this blog will still be up when it hits midnight.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
It's so beneficial for me to be away from those children in junior high and to be with people of my own mature growth. I'm looking forward to the intellectual stimulation. Nice meeting you boys. Bye. - Marcia Brady.

I am Malach, and I am a cockneye whore!

Everyone loves free stuff!

11.19.2005

Check out my Schwag!
Stool Sample Webcomics has a new Schwag page of free stuff. Feel free to use these banners and avatars as you wish, our only request is that save the image to you hard drive, and don't hotlink them to save me some bandwidth. Also it would be nice if you can link the images back to the respective comics. You may also make avatars and such out of the comics on this site on your own, again, just give the proper credit and links. There are more banners and avatars to come, and when I get around to it, some desktop themes.

To the members of Stool Sample Webcomics family, if you would like to send me banners, or stuff like that, I will put them up on that page.

Shop!
I am almost completed the first Stool Sample Webcomic Vol 1 Collection. It should be published before Xmas, and you will be able to purchase it here, at Lulu, and Amazon. I am also thinking about selling some of the original art from the comics both framed and unframed. So stay tuned to our shop.

Update.
I am about 25% completed with the latest JesusMan! and should have that up sometime around Thanksgiving, The Wraith possibly the next week, and if I get Mr. Rubbersuitman's pen and inks soon, Fat Bug, first week of December. Seriously if anyone wants to finance these webcomics, I would be more than willing to do this full time, and have them up much faster. If I can acquire a laptop, I will be able to to the digital renderings just about anywhere. Seriously though, I would love to make this a full time job, and pay the other creators a little something in addtion.

The Murk and Malach Radio Show will resume fairy soon, I will talk to Murk about it tonight. We might put it off until December, as we have a whole Xmas special planned.

Hex swears to me he has a few more New West comics in the can, but forgets to send them.

There will probably be another 4 or so pages of Star Crossed Lovers also loaded up. Because that was completed years ago, It is easy for me to get it up during lulls. All told when finished, it might have around 40 pages.

SHHHHH. My anniversary is on Monday (7 years).
Got something nice for the wife. I tell you about it later.

Malach's Quote or the Day.
Here is a Muppet News Flash. An international spy ring is trying to sneak ridiculous stories into the news... In other news, a black and yellow striped mackerel was elected king this morning. - the Muppert Newsman.

I am Malach, and I love tacos.

FEAR THE ALMIGHTY WRATH OF MALACH!

11.18.2005

They ascared now!
Well, the John Batchelor Show has capitulated and taken down my painting. I also found my Cobain painting up in a forum, but they let me advertise my site, so it stayed up.

Again, if you would like to use one of my images, I only request the following, if the image is not to be used to make money.

1. A reciprocal link right by the image to my site, saying that where the image was from.
2. Indication of who created the image.
3. And Title and Date of the image.

I would also prefer to be contacted regarding this.

If you want to use an image to make money, we can work out details on that also.

New Shtuff.
There is a new Notched Blade up. This is one of the funniest episodes I have read. All us D&D geeks will like this one.

Palmer has also graced us with a new Necromancer Ned. He has also informed me he wants to start spoofing Marvel comics. Stay tuned for this.

Yo, you mofos better learn some quick stick fighting techniques.
Cuz I learned from the best.

OK, make sense of this.
More unnesscary tax cuts to line the pockets of the rich, then cut the shit out of Medicare, Student Loans, and food stamps to help balance . This is supposed to stimulate the economy?

I am Sorry John Kerry,
But I could say that I would have us in a better place right now too. This was your problem last time, too busy spewing rhetoric and not enough substance.

So how much . . .
you think this will go for on Ebay?

So, the Dinosaurs . .
they used the Mary Jane too.

I think the real question is . . .
WHO THE FUCK CARES?

Hmm, how to out do this one.
You know I really want to try too.

OK, raise your hand . .
If you would partake in a McDonald's Deli Sandwich.

WalMart, WalMart, WalMart.
Malach still loves you . . . no . . . I hatses the walmart. The tricksies walmart . My precious.

Short People got,
no reason to live!

Malach's Quote of the Day.
Beavis, you're gonna keep talking about loogies and I'm gonna be too busy
swinging around my gigantic schlong.
- Butt-Head, Beavis and Butt-Head

I am Malach, and it is only 2" long, but it is as wide as a soup can.

FATBUG = SUCCESS!?!

11.17.2005

Wow.
Fat Bug had 42 unique visitors since it was loaded last night around 7PM and my stats for the day ended at 12AM. Not bad. I also published a Comixpedia article of FB, for the masses. You can find it here. To compare, I had about 150 unique visitors yesterday. FB also got his first request for destruction . . . JustMe's blog, which might be accomplished along with MegaTokyo in one fell swoop.

In addtion, our alexa ranking has dropped another 10,000 points to 74,083. NICE! Helping Mr. Rubbersuitman with Fat Bug, and the latest webcomic from JesusMan! and The Wraith have got me thinking. I very much enjoyed doing the "infinite canvas" style, and after looking at a few webcomic, I have decided that both my webcomics are going to continue, not nessecarily in infinite canvas, but in long form style. This means they might only update every 3 or 4 weeks (at least until I am doing this full time), but I feel the product will be vastly superior. More on this in a future essay of ReInventing Webcomics.

Hill TV.
I am liking the new layout.

Google Base.
There is a lot of buzz about Google Base. Well let me be the first to say, I am a slave to google. I have used it, I like it, this could be big from Google, and their freakin' shares are at $400 a piece, yikes.

Hrmph.
Where's the Malachsaurus?

Imagine this.
RubberSuit Studios, MA

Run Chico Run!
Man, I wonder is these shoes will help me take over the world.

Jewish Ebonics?
Oi, forschnitzle ma putzizlle.

Is this the same Matthew McConaughey . .
that was found high and naked in the woods with a buch of guys, playing the bongos? Wow, that is SEXY!

Instant Messaging
Is the tool of the devil . . . except for Skype.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
At last, war has made me into a man. Whee! - Fry, Futurama

I Malach and I am a ripe ole' bastard!

He is here or HEEE'S BAAACKKK

11.16.2005

Fat Bug.
Fat Bug has returned to the world of sequestial art. The world will never be the same.

Fat Bug was a fairly popular underground comic, at least here in the Northeast, about 15 years ago. Fat Bug whole series was just him, destroying the DC and Marvel Universes, in the most violent and creative ways possible. It had a couple of years run on a forgettable press and in the final episode, he created a black hole, which sucked in what remained of the universes, and then he disappeared. Well I got in touch with the creator, and they have agreed to revive the series for Stool Sample Webcomics, so here it is buckos!

A warning, this comic has always been and will remain mature, 18+, riding the edge of the "R+" rating. You see what happened to Superman in the first episode, imagine what he did to Wonder Woman (which I refused to reprint). Fat Bug is a rude, profane, violent, nympho beetle, and he always goes with his baser instincts. I will be making a Comixpedia article about this soon, for more info.

This time he will be taking on the world of webcomics, and as you can see, he just found MegaTokyo. As an added bonus, if you webcomic is destroyed by Fat Bug, you get this snazzy button to the right.

Fatbug will probably not just limit himself to webcomics totally, and possibly destroy sites. If you have something you want Fat Bug to destroy, just contact me.

Malach's Quote of the day.
What the f*ck does w00t mean? - Fat Bug

I am Malach and I am giddy.

He is coming . . .

11.15.2005

Hide the women and children.
As I have been alluding to you, there will be a new member of the Stool Sample Webcomics family. RubberSuit Studios has acquired the rights to this seminal title from the late 80's, that was fairly popular locally. I have even got the strips regular creator to do it. It will be fun, shocking, insulting, and insightful all the the same time. I am feeling generous and posted one of the panels for you. Those of you in the know, might recognize this fella. Those of you with a modicum of computer skills will figure out his name. He is coming. For those of you who remember him, he is a bit changed since his last appearance 15 years ago. But the is still the same sarcastic funny self.

One warning, this is defintely a mature product. I have seen the script, and some of the subject matter includes sex, dildos, alchohol, drugs, bizzare sex, more sex, insane violence, cleveland steamers, and tons of profanity. So don't say I did not warn you.

Speaking of Sex . .
Worlds coolest mom? I don't think so, that would be my mother.

Oh oh . .
Gotta take the Kahazakhstan joke out of the next JesusMan! (by the way, I got the latest script from Hex . . . it is his best stuff yet).

BACK AWAY FROM THE MEMO!
There is nothing to see people, just move along!

HEHEHEHEHEHE.
So, what do you think of RubberSuit Studios.uranus?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARRIET!

Hey Dr. Murk!
Grizzly Hunting season is now open!

Hmmm . .
How about New York's Bastard, Retarded Little Brother.

Hey!
I thought you guys were out of the Child Molestation Business?

Take a left here sucka!
I pity the fool that gives me jibba jabba, and don't follow Mr. T.

Really?
I thought she had won the biggest penis contest.

Porn, Porn, everywhere!
What a country!

Your getting a Dell Dude!
How about not selling anymore overpriced crap?

I am not falling for this.
So, excercising a half hour each day will increase your life expectancty by 3 years? Wow, what about the 12.5 years you waste of your life excercising?

Malach's Quote of the Day
I can finally build that lakehouse. And I'll run around naked all day. HAH-HA! Dangly parts... - Phil Ken Sebben, Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law.

and lest we forget . . .
















CHUCKACON


























CHUCKCON















I am Malach and I don't know when to quit!

RIP Eddie Guerrero

11.14.2005

LATEEENO HEAT!!!
Pro Wrestler Eddie Guerrero passed away yesterday. May his soul rest in peace.

I am an on and off wrestling fan. I go a few years watch it religiously, and then get bored, and don't watch (besides an occasional glance). For the past 5 years I have been the later.

During this time, I still sought knowledge about 2 wrestlers: Kurt Angle, and Eddie Guerrero. Eddie has always been a favorite of mine. Very athletic, high flying, but with this ability to make one laugh and hate his guts at the same time, Eddie was the Latin Ric Flair. You will be missed.

My wife don't think so Mr. Tooserious.
I made this pic just for you, and I can see the similarities. Same genetic stock perhaps? I imagine if the were dating the paparazzi would label them . . .

ChukaCon.

ChukaCon,

ChukaConn, ChukaCon,
Let me rock you, ChukaCon
Let me rock you, that’s all I wanna do
ChukaCon, let me rock you,
Let me rock you, ChUkaCon
Let me rock you, let me feel for you
ChukaConn let me tell you what I wanna do
Do you feel for me, the way I feel for you?
ChukaCon let me tell you what I wanna do
I wanna love you, wanna hug you, wanna squeeze you too
Let me take you in my arms
Let me fill you with my charms, Chuka
’cause you know that I’m the one to keep you warmChuka,
I’ll make you more than just a physical dream
I wanna rock you, ChukaBaby, cause you make me wanna scream!

Melle Mel ain't got nothing on me.

Quick updates.
There is a new Necromancer Ned. Ned 11 uploaded. The latest chapter in ReInventing Webcomics is also up. Our Buckos Map keeps growing, slowly, and there are now a few buckos I don't recognize. Remember, even if you just follow the blog, or the podcast, tell us who you are! The newest webcomic is about 50% complete according to it's creator and hopefully should be loaded up by the weekend . . . I might give you guys a quick preview as it comes closer.

Stupid, stupid, stupid . .
And of course the little ditty has been stuck in my head all day long.

What is this Kindergarten?
I support Capital Punishment for Idiots.

Cooooool.
The scary part is that fossils only form under certain conditions, and we probably have only found 15% of prehistoric species.

ALITO!

Hey Georgia . .
Forget, look who am I trying to talk to here, the average IQ of the state is something like 82. YEEHHHAA!

Hey New Hampshire.
When you don't have a state income tax, or sales tax, this is what you get. LIVE FREE OR DIE!

OK, who the fug is B-5?
I detest teen girls . .

Y'all best be watching Boondocks

Malach's Quote of the Day.
Some people say that I must be a terrible person, but it’s not true. I have the heart of a young boy in a jar on my desk - Stephen King

I am Malach and I am LATEEENO HEEEAAT!

THE BUCKOS ARE AWESOME!

11.13.2005

Look what you did!
Our Alex Rank is now under 100K, it is at 85,915, I couldn't be happier! 3 months ago we were at 5 million. This is awesome, it helps this site alot with advertisers, by my estimates we will be in the 30K's by the new year, nice job.

The Podcast.
You guys love it, you want more (many requests to do a weekly one). I think Murk and I will stick with monthly for now, but tell your friends, if it gets popular enough we will do them more frequently.

John Batchelor.
No reponse to this, I just sent him a e-mail.

ReInventing Webcomics.
Murk told me he will load the article tonight. So keep an eye out for it. I will update my syndication when it is up, which will update my headlines feed, so you can watch for it there also.

JesusMan!
Hex says he will have the latest script to me by mid week.

He is coming.
And the Webcomics world will never be the same.

Buckos Map.
C'mon, I know there is more of you out there!

Malach's Quote of the Day!
Priest: Well, you should definitely see The Passion. It's a very important movie.
Huey: Couldn't see it. White Jesus.
Priest: Excuse me?
Huey: Come on, man. It's supposed to be all historically accurate, but they still have a white man playing Jesus? That's some old bullshit.
- The Boondocks

I am Malach and I am a white Jesus.

Gorilla Radio

11.12.2005

Latest Podcast.
Is now up is both mp3 and Real Media versions. Murk got a new modem so his PC is working dandy. The Podcast can be founde here. It is the 11/11 podcast, and the one from 10/10 is also there (see the pattern). This one is a bit more mature than the last somewhere between PG13 and R. We interview Dick Cheney and Mr. Tooserious is or in studio guest. Funny stuff on this one.

If you would like to advertise on our next podcast, please either contact me or the boss. Our rates are very reasonable, and we can give your further information from there.

Other shtuff.
The next chapter of ReInventing Webcomics should be published tomorrow. It is a very interesting read, and I will post when it is up in the usual places. JesusMan! is on a little hiatus, as I am waiting for the script from Hex and the crew. Next week I will be debuting or latest webcomic by none other than Mr. Rubbersuitman. He is being very secretive about the title and contents, but I do know this. For those of you who have followed Stool Sample Comics from the early days will remember this beloved character. I have also been informed this will be a Mature comic, with plenty of violence, profanity, and sex, so hide the kids. I have seen some of the early sketches and I am shocked and speechless.

The Buckos Map is slowly building up, keep it going. The a few names I do not recognize on it.

Malach's Quote of the Day:
A lot of people are afraid to fly. - Wyclef Jean

I am Malach and I am not afraid to fly.

The Snow Penis, Leather Garbed Teens, PhD'ed Aliases, and Furious Bladder Squeezers.

11.11.2005

Blackmail is funny.
Hello Buckos. Look at this pic.

This picture is circa 1988 or 1989, indentities have been obscured to protect the innocent, but it shows what 4 teen chums can do at three in the morning, after a marathon night of Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, 15 Cokes a piece, Beef Lo Mein, and a blazing blizzard. Chum number 4 is holding the camera, we will just call number 4 Zack Chelpat, NECN News Anchor man. Enjoy.

The Murk and Malach Radio Show.
The mp3 is now loaded, Murk's computer had a fried modem, so he gave me a copy and I loaded it up last night. Enjoy. Also it now has a syndicated feed, which you can suscribe to here:

http://feeds.feedburner.com/TheMurkAndMalachRadioShow

New Banner?!

Dropping My Daily Stool Sample has a new banner, pretty ain't it? And don't forget the Buckos Map.

He is coming.

And the world will not be the same . . . FB.

Malach's Quote of the Day.

MY GOD! Is that really made of Kryptonite? - Superman before his death.

I am Malach and expert at creating snow phalluses!

Calling all Buckos, tell us where you at!

11.10.2005

Bucko.
As defined by Comixpedia.org is: are the rabid, almost insane fans of Stool Sample Webcomics. They can be found around the internet, spreading the "Good Word of Stool Sample". Though small in number, they are rabid enough to keep JesusMan! and The Wraith in the top 150 of various webcomics rankings sites, even though both titles are 6 months old. Buckos, also follow the musings of Malach especially in his daily blog. Males are always Buckos, Females are either Buckos, Buckarinos, or Floozies depending upon the mood of Malach.
That means you are fans of the comics, this blog, our podcasts, etc. Well, Buckos, I have a new present for you . . . The Buckos Map. So sign up, show the world where the buckos are from, and you can also advertise by putting links in you shout outs! The Buckos are taking over the world!

Speaking of Podcasts and The Wraith.
Murk and I will be recording our tonight at Murk's gold plated abode, I cannot wait to see it. The latest Wraith is also up.

This is nutty.
Damn guy, I'll give you a pretend castle for $10,000. I mean think about this, this guy is actually gonna make money on this.

Cap'n, she's given all she's got!
I can just see all the Honda's speeding about, accelerators stuck.

OK, so this was INDEX PAGE news on MSNBC.
WHY?

Hey TO.
Here you can go from the team that all they do is pass, to the team that all they do is run . . . how long before you label Vick as a homo?

Happy Birthday Sam.
Daddy loves you!

Malach's Quote of the Day.
Great art picks up where nature ends - Marc Chagall. And speaking of great art, here's some Chagall for the buckos.


I am Malach and I am a rennaisance man.

IT'S A LANGSLIDE!

11.09.2005

How long you been waiting to pull out that cheesy headline there Standard Times.
Check this puppy out. Some of the best cheesyness from the local rag, the Sub Standard Times. See how much Malach's politcal cartoons have in influence. Because of this one and my featured article on the Bristol MA Free Press, Mayor Kalisz lost 2 - 1 . . . and speaking of the Free Press, check out my latest article posted today for our incoming mayor, former NBA Agent Scott Lang. Let see how quickly this article ruins his political career.

Let see now . . . Michael Brown, gone. Fred Kalisz, gone. Gonna have to do a Dubya cartoon soon.
Check me out again.
I have no clue who this is, or how he found my painting, or why he is using it without my permission, but I left him a message, and will probably e-mail him. While I don't mind use of my images, they need to be used properly and legally. This means:

1. Contact me about using them.
2. Give me credit as the artist, and a link to my site
3. If you are using the image to make a buck, I BETTER BE IN ON IT.

It is very easy for me to trace most "thefts", I am a very reasonable man, and I have said millions of time I will allow use of images for the right circumstances for publicity.

The part that really gets me is from what I can glean, the dude is a right wing nutjob . . .why
then does he want to use a painting that is Anti Iraq War?

Funny Bumper Stickers.
Malach occasionally sees bumper stickers that tickle his fancy. One today said:
When Rapture Comes Can I Have Your Car?
Now that is funny.

Modern Day Monopolists.
No matter what BS these guys are gonna try and say, they are not going to get Joe Everyman on their side.
So I assume they allow child molestation in Bharain?
OK, so they're OK is PA, but nuts in KS?
So they fired the whole school board here, but decided that science in bad in Kansas? Well, Mr. Flying Spaghetti Monster, time to make a return. Hey KS, take a read of Bennie Goodman's latest rant on religion.
Y'know, I have no pity on the Eagles.
Your the guys that wanted him, deal with the insanity that is TO.
This is gonna sound crude.
Malach has a new saying.
Here they come . .
The Merovingian kings . . . sponsored in part by The Symbol.
Malach's Quote of the Day!
Eeet iz not I who am crazy; eeet iz I who am MAD. - Ren, Ren and Stimpy
I am Malach, and I am MAD, but not crazy!

BEANIE BABIES

11.08.2005

Hey the title is to pickup some search hits.
As you can see in the RubberSuit Studios Flea Market, Malach is going to be liquidating a large collection of 5 - 10 year old Beanie Babies. While I am not expecting to retire on the proceeds, this should make a nice bit of change for the Xmas Season. I am sure Palmer will be good for a few.

Apologies to the Buckos.
The Wraith update is much later than usual, and I apologize. I have gotten in about 15 minutes of work on it in the past few days. Luckily, I have gotten a few hours in on it today and I pushed it along nicely, hopefully it will be up by the weekend at the latest. Thanks to Palmer and Big Uncle Gorilla filling in my absences with some quality episodes of Notched Blade and Ned.

As for JesusMan!, Hex assures me the next script is forth coming . . . and he also says he has like 4 other episodes of New West he keeps forgetting to forward to me.

Finally, Dr. Murk PC has pretty much Shiite the bed. He is in the process of acquiring another. We are trying to clear our schedules to get together to do the next install of the Murk and Malach Show, so stay tuned.

These morons do realize that "talk like a Pirate Day" was a couple of months ago . . .
And I wonder what the base salary for a pirate is.

So I got all excited about this article . .
Finally a gag camera that would electrocute someone, but this article had nothing to do with that. SO DISAPPOINTED!

UGGIE, what hell?
Man am I glad he ain't in a Red Sox uniform no more.

SHARON!
That's right put that 90 year old tart in her place.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route. - Steven Wright.

I am Malach, the last of the Brachiosaurus.

Off to the Pats Game!

11.07.2005

Gonna find a way to nap at work tomorrow.
Pats game tonight, should be home by 2AM hopefully. According to the radio, they were lining up on RT 1 in Foxboro at 1PM and the lot does not open until 5PM.

When po' white trash becomes famous and rich.
This would be a good celebrity reality show.

Oh Yeah?
What do you call these press conferences?

Here they come,
Only to be knocked down by Hill-TV.

More Hill-TV cannon fodder . . .
Microsoft.

TO.
Suspened indefintely . . . I hear the Minnesota Sex Boat calling your name!

Anyone seen Boondocks!
FUNNY. Even with the excessive use of the N word.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
You think you're hot shit in a champagne glass, but you're really cold diarrhea in a Dixie cup! - The Monarch, The Venture Bros.

I am Malach and I am hot shit in a champagne glass!

T-REX F'n Mountain.

11.06.2005


In the spirit of all the sloggers who will now invade my blog.
My son got the best toy ever at his Bday today. T-REX MOUNTAIN! I can't stop playing with the frackin' thing. Go buy it now. I eats cave men. YEEHAA! And read the interesting story on the box, how the Predator dinos and caveman, are destroying their world and the Envirdinos are trying to stop them so man and dino can live in peace!

I am off the Pats game tomorrow night.
You jealous?

Nice job buckos!
Our Alexa rank is down to 100,414, just over the 100K mark. This is pretty amazing, some of the sites we out rank: Get Your War On!, 81/2 by Eleven, Comixpedia. org, Webcomiclist, Comic Alert, The Webcomiclist, etc., etc Nice work, keep it up. I should hacve the new Wraith done by the middle of the week, then we will have a Stool Sample Webcomics debut . . . It will knock you sock off.

Malach's Quote of the Day!
Excuse you T-Rex Mountain - My ultra cute (yes she gets her looks from Mrs. RubberSuitman) 2 year old daughter, talking to T-Rex Mountain, after he ate a caveman and burped.

I am Malach, and I made the Dinosaurs extinct!

Ye Olde Famous Malach Quickie . ..

11.05.2005

Was it good for you too?
Sorry, quick one today, got to get the homestead together for a dual 4 and 5 year old birthday tomorrow.

The Wraith is coming along nicely, here is a quick peek. This will help me as I wanted to see how this panel would reduce. I like this one enough to possibly put it in my portfolios.


O yeah baby, looks nice small too!

Malach's Quote of the Day!

My way of joking is to tell the truth.That's the funniest joke in the world- Muhammad Ali

I am Malach and I told you the Morivingian Kings were coming back, look at France now baby!

Congratulations Enigma Zero.

11.04.2005

So was it a boy or a girl?
Psuedo Bucko, Enigma Zero had his first child today. Welcome to the club. Now that you are a daddy, life seems a bit different no? Have fun, get some sleep, and practice those diapers.

Wow, this guy needs to take a vacation.
Nice to see that the Code of Hanurabi is alive and well there in Nevada!

I was a bit surprised not to see any New England states on this list.
Then I remembered it was moose. "Hundreds of Collisions"

I am sorry Mike Love.
But Brian Wilson is the Beach Boys.
I know so many people who think they can do it alone
They isolate their heads and stay in their safety zone
But what can you tell them
What can you say that wont make them defensive
Hang on to your ego
Hang on but I know that you’re gonna lose the fight.T
hey come on like theyre peaceful but inside theyre so uptight
They chip through the day and waste all their thoughts at night
But how can I say it
How can I come on when I know I’m guilty
Hang on to your ego
Hang on because I know that you’re gonna lose the fight
And how can I say it
How can I come on when I know I’m guilty
Hang on to your ego
Hang on
Hang on but I know that you’re gonna lose the fight

Well now, it seem Pierre Plantard was right.
Make way for the Morivigian Kings!

C'mon guy . . . The BotMaster . .
You tech nerds need better nicknames.

Goodness Gracious Great Balls of Fire!
If history has taught us anything . . . it is don't believe them Germans.

You Ruskies are pitiful with out your Communism.
Why don't they just make up holidays round here?

You think he could invest some of that cash in, oh I don't know:
Scriptwriting? Directing?

T-O, T-O, T-O, T-O . .
At this point, does anyone really want this cancer on their team. Hey TO, you called Jeff Garcia gay, what are you gonna do with Favre.

Theo to the Brockton Roxs?
Hey Brockton is closer to here than Boston.

OK, where's the joke?
Maybe Ms. Rice can write some crappy books about Jesus?

Government Grants!
For Plasma Screen TVs!

Yuck!
Man that Copernicus was one ugly mofo!

Yeah throw us a bone . .
Then burn the gays at the stake.

Malach's Quote of the Day!
Art produces ugly things which frequently become more beautiful with time. Fashion, on the other hand, produces beautiful things which always become ugly with time. - Jean Cocteau.

I am Malach, the one who should not be named.

Menau, Menau

11.03.2005

Doodoodadoodoo
Some quick updates. Our Alexa ranking is now at 113,643, that is awesome. We are probably a week or two to getting under 100K. You guys with Alexa tool bars have been awesome. We our ave rank for the past few weeks has been about 30K. Our page reach is 17.5 (this means that 17
.5 out of every million people with the Alexa toolbar are visting this site and the are 10 million users), and people with the tool bars are also viewing on average about 18 pages per day. Thanks guys.

Our average daily hit for October was about 5,500 hits, best so far this month, our average daily unique visitors was about 120, our average daily visitors was close to 300. This is a huge increase from the middle of the summer when this site started to pick up steam. Thanks also for bumping the webcomic buttons (Honestly, I only care about the hits I get from being in the top 200 and not the actual rating), the ads (the extra change has convinced my wife not to bash this stuff), and some cool conversations and e-mails.

I am about 50% done with the next episode of the Wraith, which will continue in infinite canvas style, like the last episode, while the wraith is in this hallucinatory dream sequence.

I am also about 50% done with putting together the first Stool Sample Webcomics collection book. Which will feature, The Wraith, JesusMan!, both Ned comics, The New West, and Notched Blade. Perhaps some surprises.

The Joy of Being Micheal Brown
Once again, I need to show you a political cartoon by Malach. It seems Malach was right on the money with this one according to this article.

Wow, he's not dead yet?
Joey Buttafucco is da man.

Funny Mental Picture number 4352:
Teeheeheeheee!

Big Black Holes.
Well, they ain't seen my buddy Kevin's anus yet.

So let's see . .
Fuel is up 50%, Heating your home at least 30%, Inflation the highest in 25 years, and now you want to cut food stamps?

See what those whorey Bratz dolls have created.
Ambercrombie and Fitch sucks anyway. Malach is getting into the T-shirt business, I tell you. Who wants to wear my new "Sperm Guzzler" T-Shirt? I know I can get Palmer for at least 30 of them.

OK so this blonde walks into Sumo Match.
Ok, the headline here made me guffaw.

Please, let me kill her, I will do it quickly.
Tyra, next time eat your self up to 350Lbs. I'll watch that. I bet you I can get here to wear a "Drop your Cleveland Steamer Here" shirt.

See, they pay people to do studies like this.
The Jews were right, foreskin in the devils flesh.

Malach's Quote of the Day.
"People don't know the great things Scientologists do, within education, and how they really try to help the community. It's just a very positive, wonderful thing." - Tom Cruise.

I am Malach, and I killed Nicole Brown Simpson (but not Ron Goldman)