William David Hardman Bothelho.

8.08.2005

Bullies. Everyone has experienced bullies. Now for a trip into the early life of Malach and his experience with bullies. For some strange reason, the bullies that always harrassed Malach were not your typical bullies, and you will see why in the next few paragraphs. Names have not been changed to protect the innocent.

We will start with Billy Bothelho. Malach grew up on the mean streets of Fairhaven, MA (can you detect the sarcasm?). And the town bully was alway Billy Bothelho. Bothelho, was probably 5 years older the Malach. Unlike most bullies, Billy was maybe 5'2" and 120lbs. He was also a bit delusional. You feared him until about age 8, and then you were bigger than him. Billy's biggest problem was his delusionality. He would pick on the little kids, and the big kids, equal and the same. Did not matter if you were 6" taller and 100lbs heavier, he would goad you into fighting him. The problem I have never once saw Billy win a fight he started. The boy was perpetually getting his ass kicked for situations he started. Not only that, he would start with the same people over and over, continually getting beat on. You would feel sorry for him, if he wasn't such a jerk. There was no purpose to his bullying. He never asked for anything, stole your lunch money, etc. He did steal bikes, but never strongarmed someone out of them, he secretly theived them. Maybe he just liked getting his ass kicked.

Billy (5' 2" 120lbs 16 years old): "Hey Kid, c'mere, I wanna beat you up"
Malach (5'9", 18lbs, 10 year old): "What? Didn't I send home crying a week ago?"
Billy: "Yeah, I learned a new Karate move, and now I am gonna kick you ass"
Malach: "What . . . You do realize I am much bigger than you . . . and that you constantly get your ass kicked . . . c'mon now, is it really worth it?"

Billy follows with expletives, curses, bad mouthing your family, and finally pushes you . . . you push him back and knock him sprawling. He gets up, throws a punch, that either barley hurts or missed, you punch him in the nose, he runs off crying talking about how he will get his brothers after you. Rinse and repeat next week.

I think the first time, myself and my brother figured out how much a wuss he was, was when we were 8 and 10. We were playig and he was harassing us on his bike. We got so sick of his harrassment, one of us stuck a stick in his spokes, causing him to crash and then both started beating on him as he ran down the street. We let him go, all the while he spit expletives and threatened us from down the block, he also promised to return.

In High School, Billy, who of course was a drop out, acquired a toady, Chad Souza. Chad was also very short, but fat, and did anything Billy told him to do. He was also young. One day, me and my bro (who were big kids 6' and 200lbs.), got into it with Chad and Billy at the park, walking home from school. We went to a Catholic High School, and of course wore uniforms. Way to give Billy and Chad the ammo they needed. Needless to say, the incident resulted in me and the bro tossing the two around the park like rag dolls.

I often wonder what became of Billy.

Dave Hardman. Another delusional bully. I met Dave, at that same Catholic High School. He also grew up in Fauirhaven. Funny coincidence, he grew up on the corner of Davis and Harding Sts. Dave was absolutely delusional, in a professional wrestler sort of way. He was a OK athlete, pretty good b-ball player. Also short, and somwhat chubby, Dave felt he was God's gift to the world, and had to prove it to everyone. Dave was never a fighter, but a talker (and talked about how good a fighter he was). And once he started, he did not stop. Anyone flaw, real or percieved he went after. Dave also liked to arm wrestle, but I don't recall him ever beating anyone.

Dave: "Hey fatso"
Malach: "OK, Mr. Anorexia"
Dave: "What are you calling me fat, look at these guns" Dave flexes.
Malach: "Oh David, are we going to start this again?"
Dave: "You better watch out for my sickle (he give the sign that he is going to clotheline you), I woul drop you in 2 seconds"
Malach: "Your going to try and clothesline me in a fight? You have never been is a real fight have you?"

What follows is a tirade of how great Dave is and how much better he is than Malach and how he would kick Malach's ass. It never became physical, and eventually the wit that was Malach would cause Dave to seek out Eduardo Pires out of frustration.

Dave soon got put in his place. The first and funniest incident occured, when Dave was harassing the Angry Veteran. He started his typical harrasment, that we all pretty much ingnored; but Dave today was looking to get a rise out of the Angry Veteran. So shockingly, Dave slaps him in the face, knocking his glasses to the floor. The entire room went silent, and you could feel the Veteran about to lose it. You see Dave get this deer in the headlights look, and the Veteran grabs Dave by the neck and pins him, slamming his head to a desk top. The room went silent, the Angry Veteran regains his composure, and threats to kill Dave if he ever touches his again and lets him up. Dave, is some sort of effort to save face, tells the Angry Veteran, that he is lucky Dave is is a good mood, which causes Malach to burst forth with laughter. Of course Dave yells something to Malach about watching his back, and promptly leaves the room.

Later at gym, Dave begin harassing Malach, in floor hockey, Malach buries a hockey stick across his chest. Dave gets this look of shock. Dave no longer harasses the Veteran or Malach. Angry Piper and Dr. Murk, also had run ins with Dave, but they can leave their stories in the comments. Last I knew Dave was taking courses to be a Phys. Ed. teacher and working as a cashier at a local supermarket. Good for him.

Those are really the only bullies Malach has ever had in his life. It is really kind of sad . . . most pathetic bullies ever?

I am Malach, you are not.